We all have that inner voice in our heads that chatter on incessantly throughout the day, the voice that accompanies us from early in the morning with “I’m so tired, I don’t want to wake up but I have to” till late at night with “I really should go to sleep but this is the last episode of this Netflix series.” This monologue is something that can work in our favour in terms formation of good thought processes, or against us in terms of negative destructive thought patterns that harm our sense of self-worth.
The trajectory is set fairly early in life, given a little nudge by personality, family and environment, but it is never set in stone. We can all change no matter how young or old we are, and regardless of our financial circumstances. We have no control over the things that happen to and around us, but we choose what goes on in our heads, and it starts with positive self-talk, and training that little voice that is with us since the beginning of our self-awareness and will be with us till the day we leave this earthly vessel, or “sleeve” behind.
I cannot change my body, my parents, or the country that I am born in. I cannot change the fact that things have happened to me in the past. But I can change how to speak to myself. I can choose to forgive myself when I make a genuine mistake by saying “ok I screwed up but it’s okay and I will do better next time” instead of saying “I seriously messed it up and it’s all my fault and I keep doing it wrongly again and again I don’t know what’s the point of even trying.” When faced with a new challenge I reframe the fear that I feel as excitement and speak to myself and say “well this is new and I am really excited because my heart is racing and I feel like running but this time I will run towards rather than away from that stage because it’s going to be another awesome life experience.”
Maybe you were abused when you were younger and you feel like an injured animal with raw emotions simmering just beneath the surface that might lead you towards that bottle of alcohol, drugs, computer games, abusive relationships etc. Maybe the hand that you were dealt at this game of life doesn’t seem like a fair one. I can focus on the pain of the moment and go “no one loves me, everyone hates me, let me eat worms (or swallow some oxynorm/smoke weed/drink more liquor)” or I can choose to believe that I am more than me. I am a work in progress, and I am going to be awesome and there is an eternity.
We don’t know for certain there is an eternity, although we can choose to believe and have faith in something that is unseen. Choose to believe that there is something more, that you are more than this garment of flesh, bones and organs that happened to be sewn together perfectly by evolution. Leave the debate between evolution or creation to the scholars and experts. But for yourself, choose to believe that this life is full of meaning and purpose.
Tell yourself this every moment of every day. Tame that inner voice. Train yourself to have that positive monologue, and then just be. Just live it as if you are already more than you are right now. Act first and believe it in your whole body and then let the emotions play catch up. Say amazing things to yourself and go out and act as if you are that person. “I am beautiful and everyone loves me, and if they don’t seem very kind it’s because they are a work in progress and they can get better too.”
When training that inner voice, that eternal monologue of ours, it’s easier to skip the cerebral and go back to things that instilled in us that sense of wonder when we were young. So every morning when you brush your teeth and wash your face, raise your arms up and pretend to take off to the air like Superman or Wonder-woman or Thor or Ironman. Or if you prefer animals, you can pretend a Lion or a Tiger or a Bear. Stand up tall, strong and proud and smile aways, because everything is going to be ok. Do this everyday until it becomes a habit. You will become more emotionally resilient. And if you have children, teach this to them and be that example to them and they will thank you one day.
The journey starts now by telling yourself: “Maybe I’m a Lion. Maybe I am more than me. Maybe I’m simply awesome, wonderful, beautiful, majestic, glorious reflecting divinity. I’ve been afflicted by pain and sorrow but I have overcome. I will be okay today, tomorrow, and for eternity.”
I’m looking forward to seeing your next movie.